THERE WILL ALWAYS BE CHANGE
Humans are driven to resist change but change is one thing that’s a certainty in life.Buddha called this “impermanence” and said that rejection of this fact —— and an expectation that someone else will keep you happy —— is a major cause of human suffering. We will change, our partners wii change and our circumstance wii change. Of course it’s easy to accept change for the better but it’s our response to negative change that determines our level of relationship satisfaction.
Our change that commonly creats dissatisfaction is when passion and romance began to wane. If we embrance the Buddhist notion that everything is imperformanent,we’ll know to expect different seasons in our relationships, we’ll cling less and be more able to make the most of the phase we’re in.
WHAT TO DO: Know that whatever is happening now —— be good or bad —— will change. Remember, it’ll too shall pass. Be aware that even if your relationship has come out of the passionate stage, the next stage can be satisfying in a different way, offering more emootional stability and a deeper connection.
变化总是会发生的
人类生来就拒绝改变但是改变是人生中必然发生的事情。佛教把这称为“无常”并说拒绝这一事实即期待别人可以让自己保持快乐是人类遭受苦难的主要原因。我们会改变，我们的伴侣会改变并且我们的环境也将改变。当然，积极的变化很容易令人接受，但是我们对消极变化的反应决定了我们对婚姻的满意度。
通常令人产生不满的变化发生在伴侣间热情和浪漫的衰减。如果我们能秉持佛教中“一切都是无常”的这一信念，那我们就可以预料到我们的关系会经历各种阶段，浏览不同的风景，我们也会少一些执着而有能力充分利用我们所处的各个阶段。
如何去做：要明白无现在发生的事情是好是坏，都会改变。请记住，这一切也会过去。一定要清楚即使你的婚姻已经不属于充满激情的阶段，下一个阶段也会通过提供更稳定的感情和更深的交流来使你满意。